Thursday, May 5, 2011
Titanic 2: Terrible Movies #115
Plot: Big boat sinks. Scenes seem like they're stretching for time; for instance, the shots where 12 people are waving and cheering as the ship disembarks and people keep waving, and waving, and waving. These same shots seem to be constructed in a way to keep you from seeing there are 30 extras. There's a terrible script, terrible acting, terrible editing, unconvincing CGI, and chintzy green-screen effects. Sets seem to consist of a shopping mall, a hotel atrium, a gymnasium, various boiler rooms, parking garage stairs, and a hospital hallway. Let me remind you this movie is supposed to take place on a luxury liner. All of the windows seem to be covered with slat window treatments so no one can see out of them. The ship appears to be mostly deserted, except when the few extras run in a confused manner, and often you can hear unseen people screaming as if they're facing some sort of ice water based death you rarely see. And to add insult to injury, the "douche with a heart of gold" who built the ship (Why did they build it? I don't think we know. I mean seriously, who would invest good money in a venture like that?) is the writer and director of the movie. Is this movie supposed to be funny? Well, it's freakin' hilarious. This may be the first time I've actually felt embarrassed for everyone involved in the making of a movie. Highly recommended if you like stuff that sucks. I watched it on Netflix Instant Streaming. Here's the trailer:
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