The damage to the building probably could have been avoided if I hadn't fired the maintenance staff. Well, you live and learn. Since I had no maintenance staff, I did the only sensible thing to save the building.
I called Aquaman. Here's what he looks like:
He seemed a little annoyed when I called. I'm not sure why, as he's a superhero and is expected to save people and junk, and I have an Aquaman hotline telephone in the shape of a conch installed in the penthouse exactly for situations like this. Here's how that call went down:
Stabford Deathrage, Billionaire Man About Town: Yo Aquaman, can you swing by the penthouse and fix my pipes? I've sprung a leak, and all my DVDs are getting ruined.
Aquaman, Second String Justice Leaguer: Um, who is this and how did you get my number?
Stabford Deathrage, Debonair Film Enthusiast: Duh, it's Stabford Deathrage, debonair film enthusiast, just like it says right there. Grab a wrench and stop this leak, man. I ain't got time for this.
Aquaman, Fish Whisperer: You do realize I'm a superhero and not a plumber, right? This doesn't sound like a global fish-related emergency to me.
Stabford Deathrage, Legendary Author: Mr. Freeze is on the loose bursting the pipes of tax-paying citizens and...
Aquaman, Sushi Expert: I'm going to have to stop you there. That's Batman's foe. Call him.
Stabford Deathrage, Soggy Blogger: Um, Captain Cold has escaped...
Aquaman, Worthless On Land: That's Flash's enemy. Call him.
Stabford Deathrage, Irritated Entrepreneur: Whatever. I don't care how how you do it. Communicate with a whale, ride a seahorse, or jam your finger in the end of the pipe. Just get the job done. I've already lost all my DVDs from A-D, and T-Z may not make it. If I have to replace my Blu-Ray of Birdemic, I'm going to be pissed. You've got five minutes to teleport your scaly ass down from that stupid Justice League satellite, Fish Sticks, or else.
Aquaman, Stuporfriend: *click*, *dial tone*
Anyway, I haven't watched any movies since Aquaman went ahead and allowed my penthouse to be destroyed. The last film I watched was Our Nixon.
Our Nixon is a documentary created using home movies shot by one of the guys involved in the Watergate scandal. It was pretty well done, but a little dry. Also, I'm not up on my current events, so I was a little lost about some of the finer details like who, where, what and why with regards to Watergate and Richard Nixon. One part that I really liked was when Richard Nixon said, and I paraphrase, 'I like my music square because I'm a big ol' square'. Then the Ray Conniff Singers got up on stage and ripped Ol' Tricky Dick a new one. That was pretty sweet, not because I agree with any specific politics or anything, but because I like seeing powerful people squirm a little.