Tuesday, May 28, 2013

500 MPH Storm

A wind-tousled Casper Van Dien inexplicably outruns a 500 m.p.h. storm while driving an ordinary SUV in this Asylum film. There's accelerated stock weather footage, some unconvincing hot air balloon footage, a not-crucial-to-the-plot dog, lots of shouting, and the required Asylum helicopter scene at the 39-minute mark. Honestly, you can't have an Asylum film without one. So yeah, the helicopter inexplicably crashes, of course, and everyone just seems to walk away from it without a scratch, an SUV drives through a tractor trailer as it flips over during a tornado, again without a scratch, and the cast eats granola bars. The camera is reflected in the surface of the car, but that should go without saying because this is an Asylum film, and dialogue consists of, "Those people exploded.", "There IS no internet.", "Do it!", "Let's Go!", and "AAAAAAAAH!". 

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