Tuesday, May 27, 2014

The Beast In The Cellar

There's a beast in the cellar, sort of, in this slow moving British horror film. People get shredded in extreme close up, then two spinsters bicker. That happens for a while. Actually, they should have called this film Two Spinsters Bicker, because that's pretty much all that happens. The spinsters are pretty good, and what they're bickering about is fairly interesting, so there's that. Unfortunately, they didn't call this film Two Spinsters Bicker, they called it The Beast In The Cellar. The beast in the cellar has long since escaped, and the spinsters are a little bit late on catching a clue that the beast they've got hidden in the cellar is running around shredding people in extreme close up as the camera shakes in an irritating fashion. Finally, one of the spinsters figures out they've got a shredding beast on the loose, and it certainly isn't this guy.

Anyway, she drags one of its victims through the woods but not before she accidentally pops its eyes from the socket, which is fairly cool. The Beast In The Cellar has a Cary Grant-less Arsenic And Old Lace sort of feel to it, and I probably wouldn't stop you from watching it.

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