Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Voyage To The Planet Of Prehistoric Women: Terrible Movies #219

Mamie Van Doren stands around wearing a clam-shell bikini in this slow moving outer space adventure. After two minutes of voice-over narration describing spaceships and another two minutes of waves crashing on rocks, we learn that in future 1998 a manned trip to Venus occurs but that doesn't sound like a particularly good idea because of all the bad animation of spacecraft taking off. The voice-over narration continues, usually over terrible wooden dialogue but that's totally OK because the screenplay sucks. Then, there's lots of sciency beeping noises to remind you that it's 1998, and some dude in a astronaut suit is attacked by a plant with giant tentacles and everyone drives away in a levitating AMC Pacer. Some prehistoric chicks sunbathe on rocks around the 38 minute mark, then they talk using mental telepathy, go for a swim in the ocean and eat fish as a foggy pterodactyl dangling from a string attacks for some reason. It's just awful, and I often hoped to be crushed by a bus so I could stop watching it. Avoid unless you like watching footage of people standing around looking at rocks, or looking at the ocean, or looking at some fish, or looking at a lava-covered robot, or looking at a dead rubber pterodactyl. I watched it on Youtube because there was nothing to watch on Netflix. Here you go, but don't say you weren't warned:

No comments:

Post a Comment