Monday, August 26, 2013

Lego Batman: DC Super Heroes Unite

Toys are marketed to children in this 71-minute feature length commercial. I don't know an awful lot about Legos. I was under the impression that Legos were square plastic blocks children built larger blocks with and then left on the floor so you can step on them in the night while trying to go to the bathroom which then causes you to fall down the stairs, but apparently they've been improved so you can spend $120 and build your own Batcave with about 7000 even tinier plastic blocks. Well, whaddyaknow? Yeah, like I said, I haven't been keeping up with the latest in Lego technology, but I am familiar with the Joy Division video.

Oh. It's been brought to my attention that those toys playing guitars are not Legos. Well, whatever. I don't care what brand they are, those toys are pretty good musicians.

Anyway, everybody's been up in arms about the recent announcement of Ben Affleck playing Batman in the next Superman movie. Well, everybody needs to just settle down about it. Batman has been through worse batastrophes than Batfleck Rises.

Anyone can play Batman. He's a cape, a chin, and a killer car. That's it. Meh.

So, Lego Batman: DC Heroes Unite is an irritating commercial for the expensive plastic blocks. Luthor is running for President but Joker steals the entire movie because he's pretty much the star of the show. Anyone who watches a Batman movie because of Batman is just kidding themselves. The villain is always the star, and one-note Batman and that irritatingly vapid, goody-two-shoes Superman are just along for the ride, filling in moments until the villain takes the screen again.

See what I mean? Anyway, Lego Batman: DC Super Heroes Unite is pretty irritating, but it's for kids so that's OK, I guess. There's lots of comic relief, but there are several cool shots of Arkham Asylum, and I'm a big fan of that.

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