Saturday, May 14, 2011
Snow Creature: Terrible Movies #121
A guy apparently travels to a map of Tibet where he rounds up some sherpas to help him climb the Himalayas when he isn't incessantly narrating this film. The climbers then set up camp in front of a matte painting of some mountains which seems like the perfect place to do it. Then sometime after dark, a Tibetan woman with a pile of sticks is suddenly carried off by something that looks like a lumbering Creature From The Black Lagoon crudely fashioned out of carpet remnants or a large and awkward Teddy Ruxpin with child-bearing hips. I'm assuming it's the Snow Creature, but since he often briefly looms towards the camera and then retreats into the darkness as if the film was rewound, it's hard to tell. After the American adventurers ridicule the Tibetans belief in the Yeti, which seems to greatly irritate them, the Tibetans steal the American guns and radio because that seems like the appropriate response and maybe something an American film writer in the fifties would think up. The next morning we see the sherpas setting up camp again in front of a matte painting because it's the exact same footage from earlier. You know, the one I was talking about earlier. I would go into further detail about how this film is awful, boring and slightly racist, but I've grown tired of the whole ordeal. Run, run, run from this film, unless you enjoy 70 minutes of footage of people walking up a hill carrying heavy items. It's on Netflix Instant Streaming. Here's an excitement-free clip featuring a confusing cave-in and people walking up a hill carrying heavy items with narration, but I wouldn't blame you if you didn't want to watch it.